Here is a few more for ya...

Last Friday, during singing, we were singing the bear song and it has a part about hair, and we have the kids flip their hair. Mrs. Barber was upfront, leading them and flipping her hair. One of the little darlings on the front row asked her why she had on a wig. Funny funny. She has one of those cute dye jobs where her hair is blond on top and dark on the bottom. It was funny!

The other night I ran into one of the boys in my class at Maceys. The next day, I asked him if he bought me a yummy treat while he was at Maceys. He said no, but that he would get me something the next time he went there. Well, today, he comes up to me with a package of Snickers in his hand. How sweet and embarrassing! He probably told his mom that he had to bring Mrs. Warner a treat, because she said to! So, lesson learned. Don't tease five year olds about bringing you something!

A little girl in my class, was running and her flip flop flew off. I told her to go home and tell her mom that she was grounded for making her wear flip flops. She did. The next day when her mom said that they didn't have P.E. and to just put on flip flops, she reminded her mom about being grounded. Cute!

Listen...

A cute little girl told Stacy that her mom told her when her bum spoke to her she needed to listen. Meaning her bum would tell her when she really needed to go to the bathroom. And she did!

Watch out for glurch day!

Mrs. Olsen, and her tech Dyan, were taken by surprise on Glurch day. One of their kids had molded his Glurch, and then said, "This looks like a vibrator." The two of them, "What?" " You know a vibrator." Makes you wonder what goes on at their house! At that moment they were uncontrollably laughing their guts out, and couldn't gain their composure. When another student holds up their Glurch, and asks them to look at his. They look over and see an exact replica of what you might see if you were looking at a naked ninety year old man. Gross! Now, at this point Dyan loses it, and laughs so hard she is crying, and worrying the mother that had come to class. The story in their words, hilarious, but I wish I could have been there!

Our class found out if they played with their Glurch enough, it would fart! We sent home the recipe for Glurch, today. So now many of you can have some similar experiences at home!

We took our class to the vestibule, and let them run. One little girl ran, and came in last. She gets mad at her shoes and calls them dumb, because they couldn't run fast. Next time she runs, she runs in her socks. Comes in last again. This time, you guessed it. She hated her socks, because they couldn't run fast either. At this point she is disgusted with her socks and shoes, lets out a big breath, and puts her head down on her knees. Gees, mom can't you buy your kid some faster socks and shoes!

I just thought of an old one. The first year I was tech, the kids were going down the double slide. A few decided to go down the hump in the middle. One of the kids comes up to me, and says, "Teacher, I'm going down the butt crack slide!" I haven't looked at that slide the same, since.

More turkey recipes

Paige this ones for you!
1. Get a turkey from the farm.
2. Kill it, because it's good.
3. Cook it in the baker for 5 minutes at 4 miles away.
4. Eat it.
5. Take a break.
Another little turkey said...
1. Buy a turkey.
2. The turkey is cold, so we oven it so it gets warm.
3. Get the turkey out.
4. The turkey will have feathers, because it cooked in the oven.
5. Put it outside, because it's alive!
I love turkey recipes. They are so fun, and it is a blast watching the kids as they try to think about they way they would cook a turkey. I love my job!

How to cook a turkey...

One little girls steps to cook a turkey:
1. Mom goes to the farm to get a turkey.
2. Cook the turkey for six minutes.
3. Add just a little salt.
4. When it's done dad gets to test it.
5. Dad starts coughing, mom washes off just a little salt, and then we eat it.
It kind of made us wonder what went on at that house last Thanksgiving!

What I heard today...

The conversation was between a boy and girl. The girl asked the boy if he went to church. He said no. The little girl, Oh your bad! No, I just don't want to. Some people do and some people don't. I just stood there and nodded my head.

I'm set. I have three dollars and a tarantula!

A conversation at a table went something like this.. have you ever ate an ant. No, but my dad did once. Was it gross, did you watch him. No, I don't think I was alive yet.

This is gross, but if you were there it was pretty funny. One of our little girls kept flushing the toilet. Andrea told her to quit flushing it. The little girl pointed to something in the toilet. Andrea thought I needed to see the problem, and I declined, but she made me look. In the toilet was a giant poop log. What on earth are these kids eating! It was sitting just a certain way so it wouldn't flush. We were all grossed out. Andrea tells the girl to just pee on it, and we will get it taken care of. Kim, comes back in and we are laughing. We told her there was a surprise in the potty for her. She goes in. Yup that's a seriously big problem. Why does this stuff always happen in my room? I asked if she wanted me to go get Mr. Hall. She said that he would just make fun of her. So, she went and got something out of the cupboard, and entered the bathroom. I hear the toilet flush. She comes back out and says that it went down, she just had to manipulate it a little. Gross! Now,you know why teachers need to get paid more. They are dealing with all of our kids crap! Ha ha!

I just though of a few more, and I have to write them down now, or I will forget.

It never fails when we are showing them a picture of the capital building or the white house, someone will always say,"It's the temple!" I think it's a Utah thing.

One day we had Mrs. Tingey come in and read the kids a story. When she was done she was visiting with them. One of the boys at the front told her that his sister said she was mean, and that he should beware of her. Poor Mrs. Tingey. She wanted to know who that little boys sis was, and she told him that she wasn't mean at all. That's what is so fun about kindergartners, they say exactly what is on their minds.

A few Oldies

My first year of kindergarten, one of the boys got a bloody nose, and we all know why, right? So, he says that he would tell us the truth. He was picking his nose, pulled the booger out, and the stem was still attached. Gross but funny!

A little girl in class got really excited when she thought of something that started with the letter N. As, I was walking past I glanced down at her paper, and couldn't believe my eyes. She had drawn a picture of a pair of boobs. I had Mrs. Finlayson take a look, and she asked her what she was drawing. She said you know nipples. Anna, quickly said like the nipple of a bottle. No, like the nipples on us! Teacher went and called her mom to warn her of what was coming home. Her mom simply stated that it was probably time to stop breastfeeding.

As I was trying to squeeze my through the kids to get to the front of the line, one of them said "That must be hard with a big belly." I had been deflated for the rest of the day. A five year old can either totally lift you up, or squash you right to the ground.

I hear the funniest things..

Everyday while I am at work I hear the funniest things come out of the mouths of the kindergarteners I get to work with. Here are a few from last week...

Teacher says not to worry about the ghost and goblin because they are not real. One of the kids says that's not true, what about the Holy Ghost.

Teacher asked who the man was on one of the coins, a student yells out "Josh Bush."

One of the girls noticed that something was stinky, so she kept sniffing around saying things like ew what is that something stinks. Teacher looked at her and said plug your nose and pay attention!

One little cutie told her mom that she had some rocks on her spot on the rug, and when she was asked if she told the teacher, she said no, because teacher and Mrs. Warner were chatting. I told her mom that we sit the kids on the rug say "kyhfodie" not sure if that is right and then sit and "chat" with each other, hoping they will teach themselves while on the rug!

Anyway, there's a start! I hope to hear more from the cuties at our school.